Case #6842267 – January 17th, 12:28 PM. Suspect is a brunette woman over the age of thirty. She identifies herself as Jaimie Vine, and is filed under the Must Implement Liberal Frisking, or MILF, category. At first, she claims that she does not have ID, but after some more aggressive interrogation tactics are employed, she hands over the ID card. A search reveals that she has stashed jewelry in her panties. The rest of this case is classified. Evidence logged on January 17, 2020.
Published: January 18, 2020